Why Adulting Sucks

Its not always unicorns and glitter on my blog. Truth is, recently I've been feeling really down in the dumps and that reason is - money. Money is one of my biggest triggers for my anxiety and since buying a house, I've been in a sort of constant struggling whirlwind of panic and dread. We're not in a bad way by any means, but money really does control our lives as humans and I'm talking about the bigger picture now rather than not having the odd shopping spree here and there. 

At the start of the year, I booked a surprise trip to Amsterdam for our first wedding anniversary/James' 26th birthday and decided I should spill the beans basically because we were spending a lot at the time on deposits, removal men, decorating, convenience food due to not having a fridge, furniture and all the other stuff that comes with moving house. We discussed it all and decided we'd still go, but then our boiler broke. We had to fork out for a boiler man and the new parts which totalled to the same amount as our holiday. The beginning of the year is also our time for all the car stuff - insurance, tax, MOT, as well as new wind screen wipers, wires for my printers because the wifi wasn't working, loft panels and now we're having to save for a new bathroom. So we've cancelled our trip.

Then the other night, I was tidying my laptop and camera away after hooking up to a BT hotspot downstairs (the only reachable connection!) and as I walked away with my camera on top of my laptop, it slid off and smashed onto the floor. So off I went yesterday to Jessops to ask about a repair and it turns out it would cost the same as my camera is worth to get it fixed. Do you ever just think…fuck my life?

Thing is, there is so much pressure from every angle to be leading these perfect lives all the time that when shit hits the fan, you feel like a right let down. Don't get me wrong, this is all pretty trivial, first world problems and all that but when you work your ass off to be able to achieve lovely things and they break, or the cost of living just keeps piling up, it can make you feel like you're drowning. It can be really hard to try and grasp back some of that positivity and turn a crap situation into a better one.

For our first wedding anniversary, we've got an entire week booked off now where the trip to Amsterdam should have been so we're going to cram in as much fun as possible. We've decided we're going to visit the Space Centre in Leicester, have a little shopping trip, lots of dog walks, baking, continue transforming the house and spend lots of time winding each other up. Its what you make of it so I guess todays message is, don't let the bastards get you down and when life gives you jip, poor yourself a drink then add some rum to that shit.

Thanks for reading!


  1. I'm sorry about Amsterdam :( But a week off together will be lovely, and the Space Centre is awesome! Take the dog to Bradgate Park, it's so beautiful there!

    Hels x

    1. Thankyou Hels :) Bradgate Park is lovely, one of mine will be having a leg op that week so it'll just have to be Custard :( x

  2. I knew there were good reasons I'd promised myself I'd never grow up - I conveniently forget them once in a while (am I merely blocking them out or am I also getting senile?) Kudos on successfully adulting despite all the clusterfucks! Have a fabulous time in Amsterdam!


    1. Clusterfucks?! - I love this! Thankyou :D x

  3. Hey Ellis! This is the first time I've read your blog and I have to say, I love your raw honesty and think it's so refreshing to see a blogger talk about the shit stuff as well as the good stuff (I try to on my blog but sometimes feel as though I'm moaning too much haha).

    It's funny because these things do tend to happen all at one (also LOVING clusterfucks) and I honestly think they're sent to try us. All I think when shit happens is that it can only get better, right?

    I also hate that modern day life revolves around money. Me and my husband both work full time and although we're lukcy to have our own house, we both feel that it's ridiculous that we had/have to work so hard for a home that we barely get to spend any proper time in. It all seems backwards! xx


  4. Awww Ellis! This is all so unfortunate, it's so difficult to know when things like the boiler and the camera will happen, it's so shitty to have to cancel your trip but I'm sure that a stay-cation can still be a lot of fun! Thank you for being so real and so honest with us, it's a breath of fresh air to see a blogger opening up about money! Sending love ❤️❤️

    Abbey 💋 www.abbeylouisarose.co.uk

  5. Being an adult is just so...expensive!!! All the boring things really add up. Sometimes it is lovely just to have time to relax at home, travelling can be a bit stressful. Hope you have a great week off relaxing

    X Emma | www.missemmacharlotte.com


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